Christians experiencing eating disorders often wonder whether the disorder is a sin, a sickness, or both.
Christians think about this in different ways. Some are related to different understandings of what ‘sin’ is – Is it always a deliberate and wilful choice to do wrong? Or sometimes simply an unintentional ‘missing the mark’? Is it only an act? Or is it also about what we value? Is it only individual? Or also societal and systemic? And what about the influence of things that we can’t control – like our genetics, culture and the things that have happened to us?
For some people, thinking of their eating disorder as sin exacerbates their guilt and shame, especially when they also struggle to internalise and experience God’s grace.
‘I remember just being – feeling really guilty…I just felt really guilty that I was not looking after my body ’cause the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit…And I just felt like I was just abusing it…I thought, I’m just…destroying myself. And…how dare I, ’cause God created me in his image…Oh, I don’t know. It was just a whole big mess.’
‘When I accepted my brokenness and saw that my [eating disorder] drew me away from God (AKA sin), it helped me look at recovery in another light. Although [eating disorders] are complex and there’s elements that we can’t willingly change (i.e., predisposition etc), when I owned the fact that there’s an element of choice in whether I stayed sick or not, repentance and reconciliation propelled me forward in recovery.’
The question of whether eating disorders involve sin can be painful, and it is important that Christians reflect Jesus’ compassion when we consider it. We are not going to attempt to offer a definitive answer here – each situation is unique.
However, we will highlight some approaches that are inadequate and often harmful, and offer a word of encouragement to those who are wrestling with this issue.
1. Eating disorders are not ‘just a sinful choice’
Eating disorders result from a complex variety of contributors, which can be physical, emotional, psychological, social, cultural and/or spiritual – eating disorder behaviours are only the ‘tip of the iceberg’. Many of these factors are outside the control of the person who develops the disorder. So, eating disorders are not simply a deliberate and wilful choice to disobey God. Failing to recognise this can exacerbate guilt and shame, especially when the person feels stuck and unable to change.
‘One of the biggest issues for me especially when I had my…binging and…obviously purging episodes was the guilt I felt…There were certainly elements where I…thought…[God] must be so sick of me, I keep on saying this, “I am so sorry, I am so sorry.” I am in tears…and then the cycle happens again…I felt so ugly…I kept on saying, “No, no. No, okay, I am going to stop, I am going to stop”…It was just a massive cycle.’
2. The struggle to recover from an eating disorder is not simply due to a lack of faith
Ongoing, prolonged struggle with an eating disorder should not be assumed to indicate lack of faith or prayer. Recovery from eating disorders is usually a long – and often painful – process.
Being told that suffering is always a punishment for sin or will always be removed in response to sufficient faith can be very painful. It can also reinforce religious perfectionism or even drive some people away from the church or from Christianity altogether.
‘Take this with a grain of salt, because I am not a Christian [anymore] and I don’t I guess value certain things as others might. But I think a lot of – I guess trying to be better and not do certain things, or…to not have an eating disorder…I don’t really like that because…it doesn’t work. And I feel like there are certain things…that…to others it may seem like you’re being supportive but can instead foster a false sense of hope and shame. And…with eating disorders especially, there’s already plenty of shame there. And I’ve seen things like “You just need to read the Bible more and put your faith in Jesus, and then you’ll recover”…For any religious person…that I’m sure will be a very important part for themselves, not just in recovery, but in life in general. But when that doesn’t work, you kind of foster the shame of, I still have an eating disorder, and I feel awful because I have an eating disorder. But then I’ve also got this extra layer of – because I still have an eating disorder, I’m a bad Christian and I’m not doing things right’
3. Spiritual care is not the only important aspect of eating disorder recovery support (though it may be one aspect)
Eating disorder recovery usually involves addressing both eating disorder behaviours, and the underlying factors – physical, psychological, social, cultural, and/or spiritual – that contribute to them. For some people, once an eating disorder is established, its effects can make it difficult or impossible to recover without help. In addition to offering appropriate spiritual support (if the person experiencing the eating disorder wants this), encouraging them to engage with appropriately trained eating disorder professionals is imperative.
Whether or not an eating disorder involves sin, it cannot separate you from God’s love (Rom 8:38-39). Jesus welcomes both the sick and sinners – he does not turn away in anger or disgust but instead draws close and invites them to himself. So, whether an eating disorder involves sickness, sin, or some sort of combination, Jesus cares and will walk with you on this difficult journey. He understands your pain, and he is gentle, kind and good (Heb 4:15-16, Matt 11:28-30).
